I have been finding myself a little overwhelmed these days and I don’t like it in the least. The feeling applies to everything … work in particular, evenings, home, course … life in general. Reasons? There seem to be a number of them but I can’t put my finger on anything specific.
I feel that I am rushing all the time but going nowhere. Overworked, very busy at home and never accomplishing anything. It is a frustrating feeling and when it gets to be too much, it brings me down somewhat.
It is also very tiring, physically. I have been saying for quite some time now that I am tired a lot of the time and I have been blaming it on my medications as it seemed to start when I started on the 3 anti-depression medications. Co-incidence? My psychiatrist does not believe it is completely the meds and wants me to have a test for sleep apnea. I told him that I sleep very well and soundly. He said that most people who suffer from sleep apnea believe they sleep very well.
Take yesterday as an example. Even though I did not knock myself on the weekend, I was deathly tired all day at work. Enough to close my eyes and fall immediately into a micro nap, several times in the course of the day. It didn’t stop there either. Last night at school I had to leave half way through the evening because I kept closing my eyes and couldn’t concentrate. It was so bad that I missed the first few steps of doing something and was completely lost after that.
Tomorrow I have 3 medical appointments so I am taking the day off. First the shrink then the GP who wants to talk to me about the sleep study before he makes the appointment and then the diabetes guy.
I bust my ass at work (when I am not falling asleep … which is an almost daily occurrence) and never manage to make a dent in the pile that covers my desk or spews from my inbox. It feels like I have so much to do and I can never complete tasks … generally I do about 80% of whatever it is I am working on and then let it simmer down and leave it incomplete until somebody starts asking for it.
It feels like I have so much to do at home and never have enough time to even start most of it. I don’t know where to start and can’t set any priorities … clean the bathroom today or do some homework or read blogs … so I generally end up sitting for a while and then giving up completely. My procrastinating has gotten way out of hand and is affecting me detrimentally. I make little lists of to-dos and while I may get some done, other things stay there for weeks.
The most unfortunate part of feeling this way is that it isn’t true that I have all this work to do (at work I do but not at home). I don’t have any more now than I used to. Perhaps a lot of the things I do just take longer to get done … if I read all of the blogs I have bookmarked and they all have new entries then I am set for a couple of hours. That’s why I have taken some out of my bookmark list and others I only visit once or twice a week. Even doing that leaves me with what I perceive as little time.
It’s funny how I can sit here and write that I am really not that busy but when I get home I lose that idea and begin to feel overwhelmed again. Even though you, my blog friends, are supportive and provide great feedback I feel that I miss and need somebody to hug me and hold my face in her hands and tell me that it’s all OK, that she believes in me.
About Me
- George
- "His thoughts, few that they were, lay silent in the privacy of his head." Spike Milligan
Live Feed
Cluster Maps
Blogging Personality
| Your Blogging Type is Artistic and Passionate |
 |
Refrigerator Magnets
7 Notes to Me:
Oh George, we do need that special person who loves us for who we are. You have my sincerest wish that you find her.
Oh baby...I wish I could hold your hand and hug you. I would tell you everything will be alright and it will.
I would cook for you and tell you stories. Um...better yet, you cook and I can be your helper. I've heard of some of your cooking...you are a wonderful cook. I will though clean up and still tell you stories.
I would tuck you into your bed and hold you till you fell asleep. yes I would. You are special to me.
Have a wondeful day tomorrow, my man. x
Ciao babes.
I really feel for you George. There are times when I feel completely overwhelmed and sit here thinking about all the things which need to be done, yet do nothing. It just all seems too much. I know that my work has a huge part to play in my exhaustion, yet there is little I can do about that.
I try to do as little as possible on the weekday evenings and then do most of my housework on a Satuday morning, leaving me the rest of the weekend free for fun.
I had a sleep study the year before last, checking for sleep apnea. I got the all clear, thankfully, but they still don't know what's wrong. Good luck with it George. x
I wish I could hold you, but I can't so I'll just say this: I believe in you and everything's going to be okay.
I feel tired like that a lot of the time too, but I know that mine is from sleeping poorly. I used to take a drug to help me sleep (trazodone - not a sleep drug, actually, but an anti-depressant that causes sleepiness) but stopped when my kids were born because I felt I needed to be alert for when they needed me in the night. Maybe I'll think about going back on that . . .
Hugs and kisses, George
Aw, Georgie, I wish I could hop on over to your place and help you out and give you a big hug. I know the words don't really cut it but if we lived closer I swear I'd be there in a minute.
I have noticed when I have stuff I want/need to get done at home I have to do it immediately upon getting home otherwise I'll sit at the computer and lose all interest. Don't know if that would be helpful to you at all but it's worth a shot.
And, just so you don't feel too bad, if you have a chance read about my morning, it wasn't really so great.
(((((((HUGS)))))))
I was diagnosed with sleep apnea a few years ago. I kept nodding off while driving - not a good thing. I crached into the back of a city bus one day and that prompted me to see my doctor. I described what had been happening lately and he immediately suspected I had sleep apnea and sent me to a sleep clinic.
I now sleep with a cpap machine (I cried when I learned I would have to use one) and I am convinced that it has saved my life countless times.
Definitely get tested. Sleep apnea can lead to much bigger problems than just feeling tired during the day.
Good luck and feel free to contact me if you have any questions or feel the need to discuss it with someone who has been there and done that.
Hmmm ... I didn't realize that I was so late in responding to comments.
Hey Peter ... Thank you very much
Sweet Spiky ... your words mean a lot to me. Cooking with you would be a blast ... I am a great cook as long as I have a recipe.
The bed sounds nice ... might take a while to fall asleep most nights though ;-)
Hello Miss U ... at least you have a plan for Sat morning ... my plan on Sat and Sun mornings is to sleep and I do it quite well.
Hi Bunny ... thank you for the words, hugs and kisses ... I used to sleep poorly and for the past years I have slept more and better. Yet still I get very tired. I'll find out soon, I hope, if I have a sleeping disorder.
Hi Wisdom ... knowing that I have friends like you, Bunny, Miss U, Spiky and so many others does make me feel good. Your idea sounds good ... I may give it a try.
Your morning sounds hellish ... glad you didn't break a heel, that may have put you over the edge LOL. Sorry for laughing ... you seem to have come through the ordeal nicely.
Hi Anna ... it's been a long time. I thought you had given up blogging when I no longer found your blog.
I dread the thought of having to sleep with a mask on my face but if it will save my life it's a small thing to ask.
I'll keep your offer in mind when I have questions after I see the respirologist.
Thanks
Post a Comment